I just finished walking twelve kilometers. I saw exactly zero people, in contrary to many forest clearings, one sour cream package and three beer cans. But still – refreshing crispy air, frostbitten cranberries and a glimpse of a tiny white fleeing goat’s butt in the brim of the bog. Surely I am not in Manila, Philippines anymore where it is impossible to find a moment to yourself – even when you close your eyes and ears and sing loudly LA-LA-LA to yourself. Yes, finally truly my beloved home Estonia.
“You have such pretty bluuuuueeee eyes,” the passport control in Manila sending me on my way.
“Can’t you wait a little?” was the bus driver huffing in Berlin airport towards the passengers forcing their way in.
I can’t say much about Estonia yet, I think nobody said a word to me in the airport. That is in some ways nice and gives me a sense of being home. Especially after living seven months in a city with 22 million residents and where life never stops, my brain finds it hard to handle itself. There really exists a place on this planet where everything can be so serene?
Honestly, I still find it hard to comprehend where all this time and year vanished. One moment I was skiing in northern Norway; laying shivering from the cold on a reindeer skin and gazing at aurora in the night sky. Then I was kidnapped in Austria and soon I was put on the plane. This means that most of the year 2019 I was calling Philippines my home where I was volunteering for Red Cross. Haven’t had much time to reflect on this experience that had such an impact to my life. Fortunately a-year-ago me was really kind and I can hug her for this, because she found something useful from the world wide web and she translated it. You have to share the good things in your life.
Based on an expert feedback – from my friends – we all approve. We might also be just a group of people that get excited just about everything (we do), but I would say that this is actually worth to try. And prying is prohibited, because like this notebook says: you need to SHARE. You need to analyze. Then we all can find some meaning. It will give life deeper understanding, because let’s be honest, how many of us actually reflect on life and then make conscious changes and new plans? At least now you have a chance to be one of them.
What influenced you the most this year?